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   Monday, October 11, 2004  

Tour of Depression

Welcome to Depression, the fabulous museum set up in honor of Hope's prison breaks. If you're lucky, you may even get to see the chamber where the Depression guards try to keep her chained to the wall.

If you read my last post, then you know about my possible positive. You also know I bought a box of First Response Early. You don't know that I used one of them Sunday morning. And that it was a perfect NEGATIVE. So I spent the day saying, "Yes, but it's only 11 DPO. That's too early to know. I'm pregnant, damn it. I'M PREGNANT DO YOU HEAR ME FRER???? GET WITH IT AND PUT THAT SECOND LINE ON THERE!!!"

My symptoms grew to include not just the achy breasts, but slight tenderness to the touch. The acid reflux has grown to include nausea. My nipples have changed color slightly. My skin has been breaking out for a week and I never break out like this. I'll have the occasional spot (Thank you, international bloggers for giving me something to use other than "zit" which I have always hated!). But I never have the all out fire of acne that my face has become. Except for once. When I was pregnant the first time.

I tested again this morning. Cycle day 32. Twelve days past ovulation. I was so sure that I would see that elusive second line. But not even the most optimistic squinter could see a second line if she held it up to a 1,000-watt bulb. It's just not there. It's just negative.

Don't mind me while I take a tour through Depression where I'll hear again and again how the prison guards managed to capture the wily Hope yet again. Maybe they'll even take me to the antechamber where they sit and laugh at her, bound, gagged and chained to the wall.

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  Comments about my post, "Tour of Depression":
I say it's still too early. I'm keeing everything crossed for you still -- even though I really have to pee, so come on with a positive, will ya? ;)

Sending thoughts your way sweetie.

It seems to me you've still got an ambiguous result here. Symptoms, a ++ on the CBE, no period yet . . . I say hang in there. Or maybe go out and get another CBE, just to be sure.

Thinking of you!

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