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   Wednesday, May 11, 2005  

Can't I get a fucking break????

This may not be anything. It might be something. I, frankly, don't know what it is. I've had a spot-free several days and thought I was past it. I started to be sort of happy today. After my grad class (the last of the semester! Only one summer class and I have a Master's!), I went to the bank and the grocery store. I decided that I wanted orange juice and needed water. I bought one of those 6-packs of lunch-box size cartons, 2 bottles of Evian (1 liter each) and a tuna sandwich.

Apparently that is more than I can carry even though it didn't feel heavy at all. It felt lighter than the bag I carry to classes! And yet when I got home, there is some very light pink in my panties. It's the slightest amount of blood in the cervical mucus on the tp -- seriously so much that it's only pink and not even red. But it's blood. And it's there. And I'm crying because I just want it to go away and leave both me and my baby in peace. I wish Mr. W was here right now. But he isn't. I am truly alone and need to just be an adult. It's not as much blood as I've had with other pregnancies that continued through the bleeds. If it is because of the weight of the groceries, then it's likely cervical. I'm not calling the doctor right now because there's nothing they can do. I'll call in the morning and talk to Dr. P. I had a beta done today; I'm having another Friday. I'm only just now 5 weeks, so an ultrasound really wouldn't be of much use just yet. I just have to wait. If only it were as easy as it sounds.

   [ posted  @ 8:35 PM ] [ Post a Comment ] [ View Comments (2) ]
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  Comments about my post, "Can't I get a fucking break????":
Hang in there--that bit of pink may be nothing.

With this pg, I had a week's worth of spotting that started at 5w. It started out bright red and scared the hell out of me. Then it went to pink and brown before tapering off. The doctor could never find a reason for it and I was simply told to take it easy and drink lots of water (more than the 64 oz a day I was already consuming).

Please take it as easy as you are and be good to yourself.

I'll be lurking and refreshing frantically in the meantime :-)
It not a big ask, especially after what you have been through. Uh ah.

Sitting here ready to kick hope up the ass if she gets any more careless.


 
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