Miss W -->

   Wednesday, July 13, 2005  

The one where I really have nothing to say

I had a post in my head earlier today. Of course, blogger wouldn't let me in at the time. Now? It is gone.

Tomorrow marks 14 weeks. I am going out of my mind waiting until July 22 for the next office visit. I'm already itching to get back in there and find something out. I think there out to be a rule stating that OB appointments must occur on a weekly basis just to keep women from losing their fucking minds!

I still haven't told the rest of my family. Most of them don't know I'm pregnant yet. In fact, many of them don't know that there were 3 pregnancies; they only know about the first one.

And now as I think about it, it isn't "most" of my family who don't know. My mom knows (so does my step-dad, whom I adore!); her parents know; her sister knows, as does her sister's daughter; her brother and his wife might know (never know if the grandparents have mentioned it or not). Many of my mom's mom's brothers and sisters know (I think, though I didn't tell them). My own brother and his wife know as do their two children (their 3 year old son made my parents print a picture of an ultrasound that he carries everywhere telling people that that is his aunt's baby but they can't hold it because it's still in her belly).

People who don't know include my step-dad's six brothers and sisters (yes, I said six. They're a very fertile family) and any of their children. My step-dad's mother does know, however and is quite excited. She is one of the few who was told about all of the others along the way.

And I suppose I should admit that my father does not know. I rarely speak to him, and he almost never calls me. The last time I spoke to him might have been in January when I needed medical history for an RE's evaluation. I didn't even see him over Christmas even though he lives just 10 minutes from my mom (at the time, 12 hours from where I lived). Obviously if he doesn't know, neither does his wife or the two children they adopted (and I do resent their adoption; I'm terrible I know. It was done while I was in high school, with no advance warning to me or my brother. And they chose to adopt because, as my step-mother so eloquently put it, "I will not have a child who could be less than perfect, like your other daughter."). My dad's mom and step-dad do not know; my dad's brother does not know; my dad's three sisters do not know.

I am just having a very hard time finding the words to tell any of these people without it coming out...strangely. I'm not ready to hear all the congratulations. I want them to know that there have been major hurdles to get here and that there are still major hurdles to cross before we know if this will work. I don't like to say it, but I know that I am at risk for 2nd trimester fetal death if my uterus can't expand enough. My RE said, "I guarantee it can probably go to 30 weeks." Not the most reassuring statement. And even if I do make it to 30 weeks, that is no guarantee that my child will be alright. So, I keep putting off telling people.

My grandpa (mom's dad) suggested I just wait until after the child is born and send out pictures with a note that says, "Hey, look what we made!"

Rambling. End post.

   [ posted  @ 8:07 PM ] [ Post a Comment ] [ View Comments (1) ]
   [ E-mail this Post ]

  Comments about my post, "The one where I really have nothing to say":
I second your Grandpa's idea! Thanks for dropping by yesterday.

August 2004
September 2004
October 2004
November 2004
December 2004
January 2005
February 2005
March 2005
April 2005
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
February 2010
May 2010
June 2010
March 2011
April 2011
August 2011

A Little Pregnant
Barren Mare
Broken or Not
Chez Miscarriage
Fractured Fairytale
Here Be Hippogriffs
Horkin Ramblings
Never Ever Late
One Pink Line
The RE's Muse
Scrambled Eggs
So Close
Uncommon Misconception
The Unproductive Reproductive
Wasted Birth Control

[=Powered By=]

[=Designed By=]

Customized by Miss W
Scripts / Code by "Mr. W"

Send Miss W. E-Mail!