I will not freak out like the freak that I really am
I have been trying really quite hard to be normal. To be a blissfully glowing happy pregnant woman. Of course, the mere thought of being that makes me want to vomit because, seriously, is that even possible?
So, to prove to you that I can freak out even when there is nothing to freak out about, I present today's entry.
On Friday I had my appointment where they did a full speculum exam and declared everything fine and dandy, tightly closed cervix with intact mucus plug and all.
Now, Mr. W said something about a strip of paper on the edge of one of the slides, which I assume was the nitrazine strip used to test for amniotic fluid, but I didn't see it and, you know, whatever. He said he thought it was blue.
I have been having the problem of constant wetness in my underpants for over a week. Usually it's just solidly wet. I've had a few instances where it's just one round-ish area of wetness. Completely clear. No ideas what it is or isn't. But I was having that before I went in on Friday when all was declared fine. Yesterday I noticed that it dried a yellowish tint and I thought, "Dear God, I'm pissing myself!" Which I totally probably am. I mean, they checked me out and saw no problems THREE DAYS AGO. Nothing is different now so a sane person would assume that all is well.
Have I mentioned exactly what an un-sane freak I am? I've now spent about an hour and a half googling "amniotic fluid leak" and various combinations of the same. I've searched every pregnancy board and general women's health board from WebMD to Babycenter...even the now defunct obgyn.net (or com...or something...some women's health forum that no longer exists except as an archive of old questions). I refuse to post on any of those because no less than eight million women will tell me that I should immediately go in to labor and delivery (you know, where they already know me by name and all run and hide when they see me because damn it woman stop panicking already!) and be tested and blah blah blah.
And have I mentioned that when Mr. W comes in from work in a few minutes I am totally asking him about that strip of paper since I remembered the doctor saying, 'If there is amniotic fluid present this test turns blue." And I'm sure Mr. W said he thought that strip of paper he might have seen was blue. And exactly what does THAT mean? I mean, seriously, they would have told me if it was amniotic fluid. But what else could that blue strip on the edge of the slide have been? I mean, I know they were testing me for various infections and yeast infections and blah blah blah, so, you know, it could totally have been something else. Or it could have been just the tissue paper that sterile slides are separated with to prevent them from scratching/cracking in the packaging. Or a slightly blue cover slide. I mean, seriously, Mr. W could be totally nuts.
Still, I've read that amniotic fluid will have a slightly "sweet" odor. Guess who will be sniffing her underpants after the nightly ritual of the shower. (And yes, I only shower at night when Mr. W is home. I just am not comfortable with doing that while home alone right now.)