We've reached a new agreement in the the W household. We are, potentially, going to try to have another baby.
That's right...Mr. W has agreed. Sort of.
As of now, we are going to consider using a gestational surrogate to have another child. Of course, we each had to compromise on this.
Mr. W has insisted that our GS has to be someone that we know -- we will not use an agency or classified ads to find someone. In theory I agree with this, however I also know that this is likely going to be the sticking point that prevents the whole thing from working. Primarily because I just don't know how to ask someone out of the blue if they would let us knock them up. But, assuming that this can be done, Mr. W is on board.
He is content to have just one child, so for him it isn't a big deal if a transfer were to be unsuccessful. He wanted to do just one transfer, but I felt like if we were going to do one, we had to do two. Basically, I think we've agreed to one fresh and one frozen cycle. However, that's not a guarantee. If the first cycle were to be successful, we would not do the second cycle. If the first and second were unsuccessful, we would be done -- there will be no third try.
Mr. W also decided that he does not want to donate any unused embryos -- he couldn't handle the thought of someone else with our genetic child. He also has qualms with donating them for research (it's complicated but boils down to something about a slippery slope of creating embryos specifically for research and how far those develop before being tested, etc...I don't get it, I just agreed since this was a sticking point).
In that same vein, he wants to transfer no more than 2 embryos per cycle since we really don't want to parent higher order multiples should all of them implant.
Now...any ideas as to how to find someone that we already know who has already had a child, is under the age of 35, has no history of pregnancy complications, and who would be willing to carry a baby (or possibly 2) for me?
How would all of you handle that type of situation? How would you approach someone? It's funny...it's sort of like we're moving forward on this one, but with the first limitation...it really might not be. I've got the benefit of being both hopeful and hopeless.