Wednesday, March 16, 2005

It had to happen some time

My "friend" messaged me today. If I weren't crying, I'd link to the post I wrote about her on August 7.

She decided, while I was at work, with no warning whatsoever to tell me that she is pregnant and due in October. I lost my shit at work. I ran crying from my desk to the bathroom. I'm such a mess.

She's on medication for epilepsy and has had the dosage dropped to a level that might keep her from having seizures and might not harm her baby.

And I'm not happy for her. I'm fucking pissed. I am mad as hell. She didn't even want a baby until after she found out I was trying. But her husband didn't want a baby. He didn't agree to start trying until after I'd already miscarried two. And yet she's in this race with me. My first pregnancy she told me she was going to be better at being pregnant than I am because "I don't like things that are caffeinated or anything diet so I won't be introducing those toxic chemicals to my baby." And then my baby died at 10 weeks and she told me that I shouldn't have told anyone before 12 weeks, everybody knows that! She actually followed that gem up with "I hope you've learned your lesson!" Sadly, while she hurts me, she's seriously THAT stupid and clueless. She literally honestly does NOT know that these are the wrong things to say. It doesn't excuse it, but it's the only reason I do not hate her completely. It just is NOT FUCKING FAIR that she gets a baby and I don't. It's not.

[ posted @ 6:27 PM ] [ Post a Comment ] [ View Comments (3) ]
[ E-mail this Post ]

Comments about my post, "It had to happen some time":

Well maybe you don't but I sure as hell do -- I hate her. Completely.

xxoo,
Emily

[ Permalink ] posted by Anonymous : 1:35 PM

I do not know how you keep from smacking her silly.

[ Permalink ] posted by Karen : 8:16 AM

(sorry, this comment is way late)

Wow, that's quite the "friend." She sounds like an absolute asshole.

However, the wonderfully sweet thing is this:

You are trying to get pregnant (and now you are...YAY!) because you want a child to love and raise with your husband.

She got pregnant to "one up" you. And she may have beaten you to the punch, but at what cost? She is willing to endure 9 months of pregnancy and 18+ years of child raising (when she and her husband aren't even ready for a child) just to beat you to the finish line? And when your so-very-loved child is 3 or 4 years old, and her let's-get-pregnant-so-i-can-prove-i'm-better child is 5 years old, will it matter?

Absolutely not.

She beat you to the punch, but she loses. You win.

[ Permalink ] posted by k : 1:50 PM